Brother who?

Assalaamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

I hope you are all well.

Today I saw just what Muslim males are capable of being.

I went down to the prayer room within the training centre that I am at and began praying. Then after about 2 rakaat into my fardh salaah, I saw someone come in from the corner of my eye. I thought it was a sister so I didn’t take much notice. However the person then walked across to the sink and did wudhu. That’s when I realised this was not a female. I then continued praying, as I was in the middle of my salaah, being as careful as I could in each gesture.

Throughout it all, I felt an inherent fear and confusion as to how a Muslim male could come into a room with just one female within it. Did he not know how to behave with women? Did he think it was okay?

As soon as I finished, I kindly requested that he leave until I finish my salaah. I also added that it’s not good for a man to come in whilst a female is praying. He then responded to this by saying he is a lecturer. I then replied “What does it matter? Brother please can you leave whilst I finish my salaah?”

This then set him off. He replied in a disgusting, vile and intimidating manner saying “I am not your brother! I am a lecturer and you are a student. Don’t tell me what to do!”

To see this response from someone who I am supposed to call my brother, angered, shocked and disgusted me! His arrogance at his position, coupled with his complete ignorance of khalwah (a male and female being alone), made me question just what kind of a male he really was.

He was not young and he clearly was of sane mind as he spoke with another brother who thought it was completely fine to come in whilst I was in the prayer room as well!

After the incident, I did report the incident and it is currently being looked into.

Brothers need to realise that they need to lower their gaze more than us females and that the prayer room doesn’t belong to them, thus not allowing them to feel as though they can barge in at any time.

At work, I have similar issues but not the same. As I just truly engross myself within salaah, I am met by a hard and loud attempt to gain access to the prayer room, jolting me and making me slightly lose my concentration.

Where has the hayaa in males gone?

Where have the manners gone from males?

What is going on?

Being used to males who would look down as I walked to what I have now which are males who stare as I go, I feel out of my depth and uncomfortable.

Do these males not understand what us Muslim and non-Muslim females feel when we are alone with them?

If not, I will tell you.

It is a mix of slight fear, apprehension, confusion and uncertainty. It is that feeling in which a person has to prepare themselves for anything that may come their way.

Islam has made women important and special in various aspects. For example, women have a whole surah about them in the Qur’an! We definitely must be something special then!

This complete disregard to Muslimahs needs to change.

Insha’Allah may we all be aware of our mistakes and rectify ourselves! Ameen.

JazakAllahu khairan for reading.

Assalaamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

A Modern Muslimah ❤

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I’m back and working well!!

Assalaamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

I hope you are well.

If anyone is still there, I am back!

(Insha’Allah for good!)

Sorry for going away for soooo long but I really just didn’t have the energy to blog, between work and training and my other commitments.

I definitely will try to keep up with blogging but I can’t make any promises… 😦

I just had to come back as the community of people here is just so amazing, allowing me to be able to be with other Muslim people when I can’t physically be with other Muslim people.

So let me update you on everything that has been going on!

At work, I have been doing quite well (in my opinion!) and we have another apprentice who joined us in October. His name is James and he’s been quite nice. I have started to see how the people in my team REALLY are like, which has been interesting…. I have seen some rather bad tendencies within the team, from back-biting, lying, immorality, lewdness and much more. However, I have had to try and keep myself out of these evil sins.

A few things that I will strive to implement when I go back to work (I’m on training at the moment.) are:

– saying good things about those being spoken about
– saying something when lewdness or immorality is being spoken about
– talking to them about the Deen more
– advising them not to speak in such a manner
– trying to change the subject
– doing dhikr (if I can’t get them to stop talking about bad things)
– NOT GETTING INVOLVED, AT ALL

The workplace has become quite hard to deal with, as many of the internal customers have been quite ungrateful and just generally horrible. But I recently got a reminder as to how I should do my work, which will allow me to always be happy and never depressed. That is to do everything for Allah(SWT) only. Never for any human being but only to obtain reward. That way, if anyone doesn’t say thank you or is ungrateful, horrible, etc., it will not matter to you because you would know that you have done your deed and Allah(SWT) has seen it. That is all that matters. Period.

Another area of my day, which hasn’t had as much TLC as it deserves, is my salaah. It is quite a bold thing to say (or write!) out loud but insha’Allah through saying it and looking at how to deal with it best it may help others who are going through the same thing.
We do have a prayer room and it is lovely and bare. It has absolutely nothing to it, allowing you to really switch off from work. (Insha’Allah I will try to take a picture of it.)
Even though there are about 7 or 8 people who come to the prayer room, it is quite busy as both men and women have to share access to this one room. Resulting in salawaat not peacefully completed. Between the demands of work and the demands of the next brother who needs to pray, you are left with a short amount of time to fulfill your salaah. This means the bare essentials only, with a couple of sunnah if you’re lucky. This is detrimental to us as Muslims, because we spend so much time at work yet we don’t get to live our lives at work in a full manner.
A few tips to help with this come from a course that I took with Productive Muslim called Productivity in the Workplace (I think that’s the title….)
They are as follows:

– Don’t rush your salaah. Read shorter surahs but NEVER rush it.
– Pray at the stated times, not when you have a bit of time.
– Prioritise your salaah over your work.
– Don’t be shy in asking for a break to pray within a meeting. Just like smokers will be granted a break to smoke, you should also be entitled to take some time out to do something far greater.

Last but not least is keeping up your imaan in a workplace which has more non-Muslims than Muslims. This is a common issue in many corporate environments around the world, especially in larger companies. When I first went to work, it was a big shock for me as I had spent the two years prior to that in a college close to East London, which had a majority of Muslims and a minority of non-Muslims. (This is also where and when I started practising Islam properly, but that’s for another blog post soon, insha’Allah.) I then found it very lonely having only one hijabi sister to talk to and not even all the time. Even though I still feel that I am struggling with this, I feel as though I am getting somewhere. This is because I have been able to grasp the idea that this is another test from Allah SWT to see how I will keep up the many things that I have learned in the last two (actually 3 now!) years. I also thought that maybe it is my mission to help these non-Muslims learn about Islam and its many benefits to their lives. Therefore, I am striving to keep these goals in mind when I feel a bit lonely and down, which will help me to do a lot of good at work, insha’Allah.

Being a good Muslim at all times is what we all strive to do. Just because we are at work, we have to realise that Allah SWT is still watching our every move, listening to every word we say and knowing everything we are thinking. As Abu Productive said “Work is a testing ground for Islamic manners.”

Remembering Allah SWT often will help us in the workplace and will help us in the HereAfter insha’Allah.

I know this has been a slightly long blog post but it was an update/advice post after a LONG time! It had to be a little bit long! 😉

JazakAllahu khairan for reading.

Assalaamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

A Modern Muslimah ❤